So, here we are a year later and of course the Lord is still working on me in so many ways. When Charlie was born, my big life lesson was on surrendering. Surrendering my plans for our family to move out to our own home. Surrendering my plans for the pregnancy. (using a doctor instead of a midwife like in the past). Surrendering my plans for my children. Surrendering my plans for the birth. My plans weren't bad...they just didn't match up with the Lord's plans.
I can truly say I have given up my plans. WooHoo! None of them were working out anyway. :) I am trusting the Lord that his plans are way better than anything I could come up with. They always are. Though the inbetween time is extremely difficult!
Where am I a year later? I have my good days and my bad days just like every other normal person. I have my days when I could swear the Lord is standing right next to me walking me through my day & then I have days where I can't feel him at all and I feel as though he has dumped me off on a deserted island & forgotten about me.
I admit, I have enjoyed using Charlie as an excuse to stay out of touch with people. I know that sounds horrible, especially is you know me in real life. 3 years ago I was extremely busy in ministry and homeschool world and just life as a mom of a giant family. Now, I love the fact that my busyness all comes from my kids. No more outside groups pulling for my attention. It took me a really long time to become comfortable with that, but I am now. And now that I really like not doing anything except be a mom & wife, God says, "I have something for you to do." I said, "NOOO!!!" He said, "YES!" and he wouldn't quit talking to me until I...yep, you guessed it. I had to surrender! ugh!
So, JoyMoms was born. I'm still writing on the book, but since I am a mom first I am writing slowly. But the Lord keeps talking to me about other ways to minister to moms besides just writing. I'm listening and waiting. In the mean time, I am posting as often as I can on JoyMoms.com what the Lord has taught me and is teaching me about His joy.
Today, as we celebrate Charlie's birthday I celebrate more than just his precious life.
I celebrate a God who will not leave me alone!
I celebrate a husband who has stuck with me through my hormonal craziness & spiritual depression.
I celebrate parents & in-laws who still very graciously sacrifice so much so our family can stay together.
I celebrate my kids who are still learning to just roll with the flow and be patient while we wait for God to provide what we need so we can live in our own house again.
I celebrate friends who continue to pray for me and hold me accountable.
Jude 24,25 has become my verse for this year. It is God who keeps me from stumbling and he deserves all glory for everything in my life. This verse is called the doxology of the book of Jude & I think it is a perfect doxology for my life.
Here is my Charlie. He is the joy of our family. We can't imagine our lives with out him and even though we all thought it was a crazy time for God to give us a baby we are so thrilled he is here. God knew we needed Charlie now!