Saturday, February 4, 2012

The Big Birthday Dress Up


Here I am in all my pregnant glory!  Horrible picture, but it is the best I can do right now.

All is good with me & baby except that my back now hurts constantly, but that is how I roll.

So, I just had a birthday & it was a big one!  Somehow, I always knew I would be pregnant on my 40th birthday. I finally made it to 40 as my husband puts it. He has been there for a few years now so it felt like forever waiting for me to join him. :o)

Speaking of my husband, I have I told you how wonderful he is?  Well, he is.  With our lives so crazy now he planned the perfect birthday for me.  He took me away for the weekend.  Just the 2 of us!  Special dinner & hotel was planned.  He knows me so well.

So, the dinner was at a special place and my usual clothes of sweat pants & t-shirt just wouldn't do.  Thankfully, I did have a maternity dress that I thought would work great.  I was so excited to get dressed up for a night out with my man!

I tried the dress on a few days before our weekend to make sure it would work.  It would, but it was a little low in front so I needed to buy a cami to go under it.  At my parents house, there is only a Wal-Mart within 30 minutes.  Everything else is in Tyler & that is much farther.  So, the kids & I took off to Wal-Mart so I could buy a cami.  I didn't pay a lot of attention to what kind I bought, I just bought the biggest one I could so it would go over my belly.  It wasn't until I was actually putting it on at home did I look at the tag.

I got it over my head & my arms through when I realized I might have a problem.  I looked at the tag which said in big bold letters...

TUMMY SLIMMING

Really?  My tummy doesn't need slimming...everything else on me does.  I finally got it over my pregnant breasts & then FINALLY over my belly.  Took a while & a little jumping around in circles to get it on all the way.  I looked in the mirror & it looked good with the dress.

But then I realized that even though it was smoothing out my rolls, it was also pushing down whatever it couldn't hold in.  Have you ever squeezed a balloon that is blown up in the middle?  What happens to the air you squeezed...it has to go somewhere.  Yep, I was looking like a balloon being squeezed in the middle.  I suddenly had MASSIVE saddlebags on my hips & my butt was looking funnier than normal.

No problem!  I'll get some pantyhose to smooth out the rest.  I haven't worn pantyhose in a really long time, but I just knew that would fix my problem.  Ya know...some things just can't be fixed with spandex & Lycra!

 I soon realized that I couldn't breathe with this tummy slimming thing on and the baby must have felt squeezed too because he started trying to stretch out.

I examined the cami again & realized there were 2 layers to it.  The inside layer was the "slimming" part.  No problem, I will just cut it out in the front.

Now I had to take it off so I could fix it.  Taking it off took a while & more jumping around & spinning in circles (why I spin in circles...I have no idea) before I finally got it off.  I cut out the inside layer & stuck it in my suitcase.

A few days later we are at the hotel & it is time to get dressed for my special birthday dinner.  I had packed the special jewelry my daughter made for me along with my extra dose of "gotta hold it in" under garments.  As I got dressed I kept thinking of how great I would look for my husband.  He had gone to so much trouble to make these arrangements & the least I could do is look as sexy as possible in spite of being 7 months pregnant.

First I put on the pantyhose.  Like I said, I haven't worn them in a really long time & my belly made it quite difficult to put on.  I really don't have the right words to describe to you how I got them on, but I did...and I got them over my belly.  But not easily. About this time I'm thinking about how glad I am I cut out the 2nd layer on that cami.

Then I put the cami on.  Yes, there was more jumping around in circles.  Thankfully, Scott didn't see any of this going on.  He was in the shower.

The pantyhose made the cami slide up so I had to tuck the cami inside the hose to keep it down.  You see, the dress showed EVERY seam, crinkle, roll & I was trying to not show any of that. I had a slip, but the belly was too big & it didn't fit anymore.

I finally got it all on, multiple layers of lycra and all.  Stood back & looked in the mirror & thought I was looking pretty good.  Scott agreed. He had no idea what I had just gone through to look this good for him.

We were soon off to the restaurant and it didn't take me long to realize I was in trouble.  I was held in so tightly by the layers of lycra that I couldn't breathe very well.  When our food came, I couldn't eat either. I watched Scott enjoy his steak while I nibbled on mine & finally asked for a box. I spent most of the evening waiting to get back to the hotel so I could shed the lycra and breathe again.

All in all, it was a great evening, especially once I got out of those hose & cami.  We enjoyed our time together and I will always remember my 40th birthday very well and laugh about my layers of lycra.

By the way, I gave the cami to my daughter.

Lesson for me is always read the tags carefully & never try to squeeze into something your body won't go into.  It just isn't worth it!





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