Friday, January 27, 2012

Family Pictures...always an adventure!

Just thought I would post our latest family picture.  It is a couple months old, but with us living in separate places still it is as recent as you are going to get.

So it was taken at my parents house on their front porch.  My brother is the photographer & he had his work cut out for him...get 12 people to look & smile at one time.

My brother was patient though, even when my husband decided to act up.

Finally, we got it!

And then I was done!


Thursday, January 26, 2012

Is it Really Worth It?

Are you tired?  I am too!

This mom stuff is so daily!  Everyday my kids want to eat.  They want to wear clean clothes (well, some of them).  They even want me to sit down with them & play a game or listen to them read to me! They demand so much of me!

In addition to their expectations of me, they fight & argue.  They have problems for me to help them solve.

And if I remotely care what the Lord thinks about me as a mom I have their hearts in my hand as I walk with them daily and must seek His guidance.

This is too much!

Ok, I am being extremely sarcastic, but there is a lot of honest feelings there too.  I have days when I am just not up to the MOM title.

Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy! Psalm 126:5

So much of what I do as a mom seems to be done in doubt as to if it is even worth it.
Is anyone listening to me?  Does anyone even notice that dinner is hot rather than cold?  Does anyone noticed that I sat for 2 hours matching that giant basket of socks?
Did anyone hear our Bible lesson on being kind & compassionate?

They don't always see me when I am praying for them.  They don't hear my conversations with the Lord about them (that is a good thing.).

Many of my tears have been shed out of worry that my kids will grow up to be total losers.  OK, loser is a strong word. but you know what I mean.  Does anything I do really matter?

I love Psalm 126:5.  It is my reminder that all of this is worth it!  Motherhood is so hard.  It is daily work.  You don't get a break.  But this verse reminds me, even though I may be sowing in tears, one day I will reap with shouts of joy!

The heart of my kids is worth every tear I shed when I know that they are walking in the truth of Jesus Christ.  But I can't forget that it is when my own heart is focused on my God that I can then be an example & impression on my children.  God's grace & mercy runs thick in mothers & for that I am so thankful.

I'm still tired.  I still have days I don't want to do this.  But thank goodness I'm not in this alone!  Even when I fail, my God is there.


Tuesday, January 3, 2012

You Have Given Me Greater Joy!

"You have given me greater joy than those who have abundant harvests of grain and wine." Psalm 4:7

I thumb through my son's Bible, not really looking for anything in particular, just flipping pages and I stop on this verse.  I loved it & posted it on Facebook.

Then I began really thinking about it and how true that verse is in my own life.  For those who follow me on Facebook, you may already know of the most recent trial my family is going through.  I have debated on whether or not to even blog about it because I still struggle with the reality of it.

Many of you know that our family has struggled financially for quite a while, but the Lord has always provided what we needed just when we needed it. We have learned to go without many things that years ago I thought were necessity.  In October we faced a possible situation that we really hoped that God would intervene quickly in, but he didn' least not the way we wanted Him to.

Due to months of very little (if any) income we were no longer able to pay our rent or other bills & knew we would have to move very soon. The problem was that we had no money to rent another house.  Our only solution was to move in with our parents.  Since we have such a large family that meant that we would have to split up our family because no other family had enough room for all of us.  We hoped, prayed & cried out to God many times to not let our family be split up, but He was silent.

It has been about 6 weeks now and our family continues to live separately.  I live with my parents and have our 4 youngest children with me.  My husband is living with his parents and 4 of our older kids live with him and 2 of our older daughters live with a family in our church.  Definitely not how we wanted to live.  Not what we expected to happen.  But here we are. Living 2 hours apart.  Oh & don't forget...I'm pregnant.  Crazy stuff huh?

So, back to my verse I found.

In the midst of all of this I still know where the source of my strength & joy comes from.

I won't pretend that things are easy.  They aren't. I have days where I am really done & just want my family back together.  And then there are other days that don't seem so bad at all.  But overall,  I see God at work in my life & the lives of my children. That brings me joy. I still cry about this occasionally, but that is OK.  God knows this is hard for us. This has not stolen my joy.

I look forward to what God is getting ready to do in our family!  That is my hope!

I thrive off of the strength that He gives me daily.  That is my joy!

I know that He has not forsaken my family, He is at work.  That is my salvation!