Teaching our Children Honorable Obediance

As a parent, I have no doubt that one of your biggest struggles is how to instill in your children the importance of obediance.  We are born sinners.  We are born selfish.  That is why we need a Savior.  I can remember moments with my children before they were even one year old, acting in defiance to me.  At first, I think I was shocked.  "How did you learn how to do that?"  Then I found the scripture that tells us that "foolishness is wrapped up in the heart of a child".  I have to teach my child to obey because he is born a sinner.

I have found out that there are 2 ways my children obey.

1.  They obey because I told them to.
2. They obey because they know it is the right thing to do.

This morning on my way to church I saw a policeman sitting in a parking lot pointing at the street.  You could tell the cars who saw him also, because they all began slowing down.  Once we passed him, they sped back up.  How many times have you done this?  Me too!  We see a policeman and now we use our blinker to change lanes, come to a complete stop at stop signs or go just under the speed limit.  Just by the policeman being there, he is reminding us to obey the traffic laws, we already know...plus we don't want to get a ticket!

Why don't we always obey the traffic laws?  Does it matter that there are some speed limits that seem way too slow?  it doesn't matter what you think.  The law is there for you to respect & obey for your safety & the safety of those driving around you.  We know we should obey the laws because it is the right thing to do.

My kids will do what I tell them to, but give me attitude while they do it.  Yes, I'm glad they did what I told them to, but their heart has a problem that needs to be addressed.  So actually, my childs' obediance was still sin.  Just like obeying the traffic laws only when the police are looking.  It's not truly obediance, we just don't want a ticket.

When my child obeys with a good attitude, that is complete obediance; honorable obediance. Honor means to value someone more than you value yourself.  Honorable obediance says, "I will do what you ask, because I love & respect you, and I know it is the right thing to do."  This is how we should always obey what the Lord tells us to do.

This reminds me of Abraham when God gave him the crazy orders to pack up he & Isaac & head to the mountain for sacrifice because Isaac was the sacrifice. (Genesis 22)  Abraham didn't argue with God, he just obeyed.  He honored God in his actions when he obeyed without question. If you know the story, you know that God didn't make Abraham sacrifice Isaac, he provided a ram.  Abraham was blessed for his honorable obediance.

So, how do we instill this in our children? 

First we must be living it out first.  They learn from our example, whether we like it or not! If they don't see us living in a honorable way, they probably won't understand why you think they should.

Teach your kids there are blessings with obediance.  Use the Bible to show them times when God's people were blessed because they obeyed and show them times when people didn't obey and what happened.
Some examples of stories of obediance are: Daniel 3 (Shadrach, Meshach & Abednego), Genesis 6 (Noah), Daniel 1 (Daniel & his friends)

When you tell your child to do something and they respond in a negative way, stop them, don't let them continue to do what you told them to do.

"Fred, I asked you to unload the dishwasher and you rolled your eyes at me.  Is that an appropriate response?"  Then repeat the instruction.  My kids are to say, "Yes mam" when I tell them to do something, we call that an appropriate response as long as they aren't rolling their eyes when they say it. :)  When your child does respond in an honorable way, shower them with praise!  But when they dobn't, take time to correct & remind them of the correct way to obey.

"Thank you so much for responding to me like that!"

It is really important that our children learn to obey with honor.  It is a matter of the heart.

 Our actions mean nothing to God, it is our heart that he wants.

Excellent Day

What a week!  I could end right there & not say anything more, but you know me.  I have too many words dying to be written!

This was one of the most crazy weeks that I have had in a really long time, but I'm not complaining, yet I feel like I am.  If you have followed my blog for any amount of time you know that we have been in a financial crisis for quite a while.  Even though my husband has remained in Real Estate there has not been enough business to provide for us.  He has been looking for almost 2 years for a part time job with no success...I mean NOTHING!  Then all of a sudden out of the blue comes this job opportunity.  It is contract work, so we don't know how long he will have it, but we are so thankful for it while he has it.  He can pick his hours so that is really good.  BUT (you knew I had to add a "but"), it is located in downtown Dallas so he rides the train into downtown.  No biggie, except that we don't have a second car so I take him to the station every morning & pick him up every evening.  No biggie, except I DON'T DO MORNINGS!.  Well, now I do.  We leave the house about 6:30 every morning for the 30 minute ride in the dark.  By the time I get him to the station the sun is coming up.  When I get home there is usually at least one child awake watching cartoons on the couch.  My day has officially begun & I feel as though I am running until I finally fall into bed at night.

Scott has been home for about 3 years now.  All the time.  Everyday.   Now after 3 years, he is gone all day & when he comes home it is exhausted so there isn't much conversation happening. 

It has been a hard week.  We are getting used to Daddy not being home.  Mom doing all the driving around and all the school work and all of the whatever else needs to be done.

Plus on top of all that, our homeschool co-op started on Monday.  We have never participated in a co-op before so this was totally new for all of us.  And I can't just go like all the other moms, I have to help coordinate part of it (ugh).  I am the cleaning coordinator & now I know why no one else wanted that job.  So Monday was bad...very bad...not-ever-wanting-to-go-back bad.  My kids loved it & I am committed to it & I know that it was the first day.  Already things are looking better.

So, did I say it was a hard week?  I just haven't felt this tired in a long time. And as we all know, with exhaustion comes lots of emotions.  One side of me is saying, "Thank you Lord for providing Scott with a job" & the other side is saying"I'm so tired, I don't wanna get up when it is dark, I don't wanna deal with bad kid attitudes, I don't wanna do this anymore!"

Then there was today.

Scott does the sound for Mom2Mom again, so he and Ashley (who works childcare) left at 8:00 & I was still in bed! Yes that is right, I slept past 6:00!  Then I casually got up & made waffles.  Then we casually started school, then I casually checked email. The whole day was relaxed & casual & I am still in my PJ's!  I love day's like that!  All my days were like that, but now with our new crazy schedule I can appreciate them much better & look forward to them.  We had an excellent day!  Thank you Jesus!

Reflections of Motherhood

Someone posted this on Facebook & I wanted to share it with you. I thought it was really neat & a good reminder to those of us moms who have been at this mom thing for a while now. I don't know where this video originated from or the ones who posted it & I don't endorse them. I just like the video.

Washed Away to Produce a Harvest

We have had more rain in the past 3 days than we did all summer. Tropical Storm Hermine moved through Texas with great force & brought tornadoes, flooding and a lot of complaining.

My husband started a new job this week.  In order for him to get to his job, I have to take him to the train station so he can ride the train into downtown Dallas.  It is a 30-40 minute drive for us & then another 30 minutes on the train.  So every morning around 6:50 Scott & I leave, in the rain, for the drive in the traffic to to train station.  It was a pain.  I hate driving in the rain.

This morning we left & it was cloudy again, but it wasn't raining.  On the way home after dropping Scott off, I was thinking about how glad I was that the rain was over.  As I kept thinking about this, the Lord brought this verse to my mind.

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Hebrews 12:11 (NIV)

The rain really only lasted a few days and we complained the whole time it was here.  But once it was over the sky was clear, rainbows could be seen, the grass will green up soon and the lakes & ponds are full again.  The rain was good!
When the Lord brings discipline to our lives, we rarely (if ever) say, "Oh good, I'm so glad you are disciplining me."  Instead we are complaining because life is difficult or uncomfortable. We don't like pain, we don't like to hurt, we don't like to be stretched beyond our comfort level.
But as we mature in our faith & understanding of God & His ways, we are able to appreciate the discipline he brings because we know that it is producing in us a harvest of righteousness and peace.  The verse before verse 11 says, "God disciplines us for good, that we may share in his holiness." (Hebrews 12:10)  In order to share in HIS holiness, we must be disciplined to bring about what is good in us.

That rain we had for 3 days washed away the smog in the air, cleaned off our streets, brought fresh water to the lakes & ponds.  We didn't like it raining for so long, but the end results were good.

I encourage you, the next time the Lord brings hardship & adversity into your life to embrace it as an opportunity to washed away and let His holiness be revealed in you.  Don't fight it, don't argue or complain, recognize it for what it is...God working in your life, producing a harvest or righteousness.